Many caregivers, whether in families, healthcare, new parents, CEO/CFOs, entrepreneurs/small business owners, first responders/police officers, are hailed as “strong” precisely because they step up when others falter. Juggling complex schedules, absorbing emotional pain, and laboring tirelessly to meet everyone’s needs, often doing TOO MUCH. And this over-functioning, constantly putting others first, can exact a heavy psychological and physical toll. Many clients I work with, who know they struggle doing-too-much, believe that they must take on this burden alone and have a false, sometimes toxic self-narrative that asking for help is a sign of weakness.

 

They become the “fixers” of crises—medical emergencies, family conflicts, emotional crises—without pause for self-care. But it comes with a price. In prioritizing EVERYONE ELSE, they neglect their own mental health, relationships, and dreams/passions in life. Sleep issues, chronic stress symptoms, depression, anxiety, burnout, and feelings of isolation are common issues. Self-worth becomes tethered to caregiving success. When outcomes slip beyond their control—illness progression, loved ones’ unhappiness—they experience intense guilt and self-blame.

 

In therapy, over-functioning caregivers can unburden themselves of fear, guilt, and anger—emotions they’ve routinely suppressed to stay “strong.” We can rediscover yourself, cultivating the garden of you outside this narrative and reclaim YOURSELF and identity! We will work on compassion, healthy boundaries, stress management, and finding play again! Let’s ditch the negative self-talk and belief that you are valued only for your service and ‘giving’—never feeling enough and empower the inner you that wants to shine for yourself now, not just the world around you!

 

Self-care is a necessity, not a luxury, and being able to give yourself that permission, that gift, and shift out of the rubble of what you think you ‘should be doing’—and find yourself again.